Triggers, Unsubs, and Criminal Minds
Posted: Friday, June 25, 2010
by Randy Vaughan
I watch very little television. It is useless as a source of reliable information about current events. Regrettably, it has minimal value for learning and education. And the idea of any inherent "entertainment" value depends completely upon one's understanding and definition of the word "entertainment". Throwing Christians to the lions once had "entertainment" value. The lions were, I imagine, ambivalent. The Christians probably found little "entertainment" in their participation. At the very least, however, that was "real" TV. The only thing real about "reality TV" is that it's real bad.
Truth is we have reduced most of life to "formulas" as well. And that's proven to be unacceptable for me, not because of any deliberate act of rebellion or attitude on my part, mind you, but rather these "formulas" are simply contrary to the essence of who and what I am. And as John Lennon said: "I cannot be who I am not."
We have formulas for "ideal candidates" who are in turn expected to be "good employees" and we are all expected to follow the script for "good citizen" and "loyal American" and "taxpayer" and on and on until I want to scream. But I digress.
So "Criminal Minds" is no more complicated in plot than this:
A killer is on the loose and it's up to the stars to figure out who the killer is and they can't do that until the understand why he's doing it. "Why" is the "trigger," that specific event or series of events that set everything into motion. Only then can they figure out the "who," who the "unsub" is. It is fascinating that they not only come to know all about this person, this "unknown subject," and indeed really "know" the person, long before they have a name.
That, of course, is what they call "profiling". It's a word that gets a lot of bad press these days. But there is truth in the process behind it. I can tell you, for example, and based only on my experience, that here in my part of the world, if you told me you were looking for a District Manager for almost any type of major retail operation, but especially fast-food and grocery store chains, you're looking for a white mail, late-thirties or older, overweight, walks extremely pronated (toes point outward), no facial hair, three-piece suit, long sleeve shirts regardless of the weather, black leather shoes, dark socks, necktie pressed entirely too tight against his neck, talks very loudly, rarely makes eye contact, makes a disgustingly pretentious display of warmth and friendliness to customers but is a tyrant when dealing with his subordinates, suffers from megalomania and takes both himself and his job entirely too seriously and subsequently demands, expects, and requires the same from everyone else, and complains in private of the absence of romance and passion in his personal life.
Trust me: I'll be correct ninety-eight times out of a hundred. And the only times I'd be wrong would be regarding gender and race.
Most people who get to that level of success within those types of organizations do so because they can, and do, follow the "formula". I tried. I couldn't.
And so I've given excessive time to trying to figure out those "triggers" in my life that moved me to act and react as I have. And once I'm confident I know the "why's," it does indeed follow that I know the "unknown subjects" responsible. Again, however, knowing this "unsub" by his profile isn't the same as knowing this person by actual name. And so in some cases I'm left with only "unknown subjects," nameless people from my past who were the "triggers," pushed my hot-buttons. In others, oh my, I know the name all too well.
So for example: I loathe that part of me that finds it relatively easy to control and manipulate not only words, but people as well. I know the games that are played, how they are played, and why they are played. After all, as Shakespeare told us, the world is indeed a stage and we're all just playing our parts. I never once got so caught up in playing my own part, however, that I wasn't always watching, learning from, and critiquing the other actors around me.
And so it was every business and employment setting in which I found myself, each and every single one of my nearly sixty employers from whom I learned the fine arts of lying, deceit, double-speak, control and manipulation of others.
What I learned from the rest of my life-my parents, teachers, the examples of people I've loved and respected, sage wisdom passed down since man began jotting down notes on stone tablets-what I learned that more than cancels all that negativity in my life is reduced, for lack of a better word, to The Golden Rule.
My employment history, you see, is indeed the result of what others have called an "attitude problem" on my part. And indeed I do have an attitude problem. If you think the simple fact that signing my paycheck entitles you to treat my like a peasant or a serf from the Dark Ages, my attitude is that you and I have nothing of real substance and meaning in common. That makes it time for me to move on.
There was, however, an even greater "trigger" by "unsubs" that gave birth to that core "attitude," that which became the defining essence of who I am.
I found myself graduating from high school at age sixteen because I had skipped the fifth grade. And the night of graduation also became the night of my first date. And that first date led to my first kiss which in turn led to those other "firsts" in a young man's life and from that you easily understand that this girl also became the first love of my life.
And before the first year of that young love was over, my parents intervened. It took the form of an ultimatum: Dump her or get out.
Well, now at only seventeen I really didn't relish the idea of leaving home; okay, the thought scared the hell out of me. So I gave in to the authority figures in my life, my parents, as well as that fear. In essence, I sacrificed love for safety and security.
Within a few months a new love was quickly mending my broken heart. And now, one half of those authority figures in my life, my dad, was trying to teach me about the real world-prepare me, actually-by insisting I start paying "rent" to live at home. He clearly disagreed with my contention that such payment constituted the freedom on my part to come and go as I wanted as well as have anyone I wanted stay with me. I was to pay "rent," you see, in order to get ready for that "real world," but I was to continue to live under the legacy of "my house, my rules".
And so again came another ultimatum: "If you can find somewhere else for what I'm charging you, get out."
Within a couple of weeks I did indeed find a "room for rent" for exactly one dollar more per week. It was only one-half mile from where my girlfriend lived and about the same distance from where I was working. Too good to be true, right?
So I left home.
Time now to compare the "triggers," the events that led to my actions.
I sacrificed love the first time over safety and security, i.e., money, the fear of trying to make it own my own.
The second time I sacrificed safety and security over a measly one dollar a week.
My destiny was now set in stone and remains so to this very moment.
Any so-called authority figure, i.e., employer, who even hints trying to use fear and intimidation to keep me in line, to compel my obedience, my conformity, compromise, and capitulation-any employer who does that is one who quickly becomes a burned bridge.
And any time, regardless of the situation, there is a "choice" to be made between love or money, know that in my world love trumps money every time, period, end of discussion.
So for example, when Lisa and I started living together in 1980 and I was told I had to "choose" between not living with her or getting fired, well, you understand why I got fired, never looked back, and have no regrets.
It wasn't criminal that my parents were understandably worried that perhaps I was "too young" to actually "love" my first girlfriend. It was, however, criminal as hell that they used fear and ultimatums to get their way.
It wasn't criminal that my old man's intentions were nothing but well-intentioned by preparing me for the "real world" by asking me to pay room and board. It was, however, criminal as hell that he was determined to control every aspect of my life, love and money, through fear and intimidation and threats.
It wasn't criminal that the business owner had every right to manage his business as he saw fit. It was, however, criminal as hell when he gave me the "choice" of living with Lisa or getting fired.
What he should have done was simply fire me and been done with it. After all, it wasn't until after my meeting with him and I was later talking to Lisa that I learned she'd been given no such "choice". She had simply been fired and escorted out the building.
I've never given much thought, consideration, or serious planning for the future. After all, as I read in a "Mad Magazine" probably forty or more years ago, "Today is the tomorrow we talk about yesterday."
Ah, but those yesterdays? Trying to make sense of those is greatly responsible for so many sleepless nights. But guess what? I know what my triggers are and who those unsubs are, even those whose names I never knew or have forgotten. And I can spot of those potential unknown subjects from a mile away.
Now, where's the remote so I can flip through the channels, only to finally turn off the television and actually watch nothing.
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Top-level comments on this article: (1 total)I can easily relate to many of the points in this article, having retired from a managerial position of a large retail chain.I seemed to be an anomaly among the rank and file in the way I deviated from the usual practices of management-and usually had no problem convincing the "higher ups" of the wisdom of my decisions.Most intelligent people have a sense that some of the iron clad rules set in place, have need to be bent, at times, to allow for the fraility of human nature.-which is not iron-clad. Well written- thought provoking article- Thank you- Always- EllaAin't retail sales a living hell? Hands down it is the most unsatisfying job I ever had. The hideous beast call "the public" should be summarily executed and in those "upper" echelons of the hierarchy, well, I've said enough already. I've about a trillion stories just from retail sales experience--quitting over one-half pound of missing hamburger meat, seeing a store manager get replaced because two lights were out on the sales floor, and I can shut up because I'm preaching to the choir, right?Ella, I learned this from all those employers:1. I rather work for, with, and around women any day. (I know, most women, like Lisa, my wife, prefer the company of men. It's not that I don't know that women can be "catty" and all the rest, but those female "quirks" are much easier to tolerate, overlook, and understand than the testosterone driven lunacy of the males.)2. If I was a woman, I'd be gay. Yes, men, in general, have indeed @#$@#&*ed me off that much (again, understood to be within the confines of working, etc.). Men used up all their passions for their jobs, their careers, their bosses, have none left for the ladies in their lives, and then I'm the guy who has had to endure their whining and complaining about never getting laid. One word: Dumbasses...Enjoy the day now....
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